Batman, Buddha, and You

My fiance is a Registered Nurse at one of the local hospitals here in Oregon. She work's specifically with cancer patients and specializes in giving Chemotherapy.

I remember when we first met, I was so amazed at how strong she was. I admired her ability to treat her patients with such a gentle spirit while maintaining her strength as she sometimes had to watch them pass away.

I'll never forget her words to me as I asked her how she is able to deal with their loss.

"Jerrad, death is as much a part of life as anything else. It's never easy to watch, but it's a reality we all will eventually face." She said.

It's a weird subject to talk about. I use the word "weird" because I really don't know how else to put it. Even as I write about death I feel odd. You may get a similar feeling as you start to think about it, unless you are an RN, I guess.

Maybe it's "weird" because it is a mystery. I mean, we can explain, through science, how the body stops working, but beyond that we don't know much.

Death has no prejudice. It will take the young or the old. The rich or the poor. The black or the white. And despite all the plastic surgeries and age-enhancing drugs, it will eventually happen to every human that is breathing as I write this.

If, by some miracle, you are still reading this and not curled up in a fetal position weeping, I'd like to change gears.

I recently came home from a trip I took to Nicaragua for two weeks. During my time in the country, I had the opportunity to meet a man named Earl. Earl is about 5'7, has very little hair, and is a little more on the heavy side. At first glace, Earl is really no different than the average guy.

Awhile back Earl felt like he needed to start a church in a little Nicaraguan town called Puerta Cabazas. Despite having hardly anyone show up to his church, Earl developed a huge heart for this community. He started an orphanage for the hundreds of orphans in the area. These kids receive an education, basic skills, 3 meals a day, and genuine love on a daily basis.

Earl has also raised money, through his small church, to build numerous homes for families who were forced into homelessness by recent hurricanes.

Earl has a cool story.

The earth is covered with "Earl's". Men and women who have dedicated their whole life to making other people's lives better. You hear the stories of people who devote their life to getting clean water for people in Africa. Or people who spend countless hours fighting for children around the world being used in sex-trafficking. Or even the guy who heats up leftovers from local restaurants to feed the homeless people in the park.

I wonder if some people are just meant for that. I mean, were some people just born to help a bunch of people, while the rest of us watch?

I think Earl is OK with not being the main character in his story. I think he is OK with being a co-star in his own story and allowing everyone else take the spotlight. I really do think that he wakes up and uses his eyes as cameras to see the world around him. And in his story, it's not about him.

I have no control over death, but I have control of my story.

Nothing annoys me more than home videos. Especially when they are of other people. Although I have found that most people can sit and watch videos of their own life for hours.

I think if we're honest, we'd all say there are some pretty lame stories out there. Stories of husbands cheating on their wife. Stories of people gossiping about other people. Stories of dad's leaving their kids. Stories of people working so hard to obtain their dream, that they miss the world around them. Stories of selfishness.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that death doesn't scare me as much as the thought of people showing up to my funeral and saying my story was all about me.

I don't want to live the kind of life where people would just be sad if I leave, but that the world would actually be a different place if and when I die. I want to live the kind of story that touches lives. A story that makes a dent in the injustice in the world. A story that brings a glimpse of hope in dark places. I want to live a story that honors my wife, challenges my peers, and sets an example to the generation behind me.

We can't control death, but we write our story everyday. Maybe today you can be the hero in the story of someone else. That may involve bringing clean water to a dying nation. It may be opening a door for someone. It may be both.

What's your story?